Balloons.

I'm accidentally wearing a screwdriver as a necklace today. Hm.

I don't feel like writing; I've damn near lost all motivation...

...But I feel a bit obligated. My last post almost ruined a relationship that was the best thing that ever happened to my best friend. But instead, I let it ruin my friendship with that person. He had to choose. I made sure he chose her, and I'm not sure why, but I think I'm doing a damn good job of pretending I'm happy with that. I want nothing more than to see everyone I care about happy. And if it takes me, walking straight out of one of the strongest, most reliable friendships I have ever had, then that is what I need to do. He is happy, and she no longer has to worry.
I wish you knew that there was no reason to worry in the first place and I wish that you knew how important he is to me and I wish you knew that he loves you so much and I wish you trusted him and trusted me; I wish so many things but bottom line is that I made a mistake and I'm sorry.

"Time to leave, while my eyes are still dry. It's time to leave while my head is held high. It's time to bolt, time to bail, time to go. Where to? Well I really don't know.

I'm gone, so long, see you soon. Up up and away, like a rising balloon. I'm just stupid enough, to pack up and leave. Taking all that you have trusted, and confided in me."

Blaaahhhhh.
But I'll live, I mean I'm certain that I will make it through this, again.


After all, what's one more person after I've lost so many, right?
I'm learning, trying, doing. For his sake. Their sake.

This is me, walking away from my best friend. As a definitive answer to his problems.
Again; I'm sorry, but I can only hope and pray that things get better for you from here.

I'm staying strong.